When will this end?

I wake up to a stranger every morning. She looks at me with a clear sign of pity on her face, like she just can't believe I have the nerve to wake up. This stranger is me, and yet, it isn't me.
Blue eyes wet with secretion look back at me and I can see her heart break.


I have to get away.
Where? I don't know.
I don't really care either.


At the top of a mountain, on the very edge. I feel the salty air breeze over my body. The chills send goosebumps everywhere. I look down and see the waves crashing against the rocks.
I'm not afraid, this is just the first step in releasing myself.
I close my eyes, count to three, take a deep breath, and jump.
In less than ten seconds, I'm submerged in icy cold water.


I'm tossed around, I don't know which way is up, or down. It's become apparent that I should try to find the surface soon, for I can't hold my breath forever. But something keeps me frozen for a little while longer. It's you. I think about you and everything that I went through. You made me laugh. You made me cry. You made want to feel loved, and to give love in return.
So here I am, drowning my memories of you.


I finally see the surface, my savior. I break through and take in a deep breath. Water falls down my face. It isn't just from the sea.
I've fallen, gravity has let go of me.
I close my eyes and start to relax.
I'm not held back, I feel no pull.


I'm free. From you. For now.


for you are like the tide, you always leave..
but you always, always, always..come back.
And I'll take you in, just like before. Tonight I'll sit and think of you, I won't be able to help it.


For you are constant like the seasons, and just as predictable.
And I'm utterly in love with you.